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Every year women all over the world make countless New Year Resolutions that center around things like losing weight, getting in shape, getting out of debt, and making more money.
While all good resolutions, I have some suggestions for your consideration that will fill your soul, make you feel good about yourself and help others along the way.
5 New Year Resolutions Every Woman Should Make This Year
Don’t Accept Body Shaming, Especially From Yourself
If you’ve ever looked into the mirror only to chastise yourself for big thighs, the lack of a flat stomach, a big butt, a double chin or any disgust over your body, then you know what I’m talking about.
It’s bad enough that society puts so much damn pressure on women to look a certain way, it’s even worse when we do it to ourselves or each other.
Maybe you saw the video that Nicole Arbour, comedian (a title she must have given herself as I don’t find her funny at all) made entitled “Dear Fat People?” What disturbs me most of all about the video, and people like her, is how cruel she is to those who are different or who don’t meet some arbitrary standard of weight. This woman is a bully, but she’s not the only one.
Everyday women, men, and children are bullied because of the way they look. Their self-esteem is chipped at, poked at, whittled away until there’s nothing left except a shell of a person who hates themselves when they look in the mirror.
How do we combat this?
I’ve spent my entire life criticizing my body. I hate to look at pictures of myself when I gain weight because I hate how fat I look. Even when I was 5’8″ and 140 lbs, I didn’t or couldn’t see how great my body looked. I still remember my boyfriend telling me if I could only “loose” the small amount of fat that hugged my hips, I’d be perfect. I was already killing myself with diet and exercise. I remember thinking to myself, “I’m Italian, that’s the way I’m made – I’m curvy.”
Last year I started watching the TLC show, My Big Fat Fabulous Life. The star, Whitney Thore is a self-proclaimed fat girl, who is on a mission to rid the world of body shaming. I am in awe of this woman and how she refuses to buy into the societal bull sh*t about how she should look. She clearly loves herself in spite of her size.
She also gave a beautiful, articulate and ‘back at you Nicole’ video response of her own that was SPOT ON!
She woke up one day and decided the self-hatred had to stop and so it did. I wish I could flip a switch and end my self-shaming that quickly. For me, it’s going to take a bit more time. This year, I’m going to resolve to work actively on learning to love my body, no matter it’s size and end my self-imposed body shaming.
How about you? Is this a resolution you’re willing to make?
Make Time For Yourself
The one thing I’ve learned over the last several years of being on the go, nonstop, is how little I take care of myself. Between my mother’s illness, reinventing my business, managing the cleaning the company, supporting my daughter through her pregnancy and taking care of my grandson, I’m exhausted.
As I sat here thinking about this post, it occurred to me that I had done nothing for myself in weeks. It hit me when I had to once again, cancel yet another massage I had scheduled. It was the third cancelation in as many weeks, and I felt like a complete failure at managing my time.
The truth of the matter is I just have too much on my plate, and none of it includes self-care.
This year, I’m resolving to do something on a regular basis that takes care of my body and soul. I’m not sure what it will be and how yet it will be accomplished, but I’m committed to making it happen.
This will include an increase in the word “NO”. I’m digging it out, dusting it off and making good use of it this year.
How about you? Are you willing to make time for yourself this year?
Put Down Your iPhone And Pay Attention to Your Family
We’ve all gone off the deep end!
We are a society consumed with checking emails, updating statuses, commenting, posting on Instagram and tweeting our every thought.
Social media is a necessary evil, and it’s here to stay of that I’m sure. But when we’re with our family playing a game, eating dinner, watching a movie, whatever quality time activity we’re engaged in, let’s make a resolution to put the phones away. We’ll all live.
Most importantly we’ll thrive as families. Being engaged with your loved ones can be the most joyful experience if we let it. I know my family is far more significant and worthwhile than anything else that’s going on in Facebook. So make a resolution as a family to put the phones down and enjoy one another’s company. If your family won’t comply, make yourself the example and refuse to look at your phone when you’re together. I bet others will follow your lead.
Be Of Service To Others
I have participated in volunteer work on and off for years. Although I am not currently involved in an ongoing volunteer activity, I try to make time to be of service to others in need as much as possible. It’s something I’m committed to improving this year.
[tweetthis]Nothing fills you with more joy than when you do something selflessly for someone else.[/tweetthis]
On Christmas Eve day I read a post from a friend who was approached by a woman asking for money for food. She said, “I’ll do one better and buy you a weeks worth of groceries.” Off they went together. My friend felt so good in helping this woman and ensuring she had something to eat every day for the next week.
We all love reading these stories and others like it, like when someone pays for the coffee of the person behind them in the drive-thru. But what will it take for us to collectively up the ante and be regular participants of service to others?
This year I’m committing to seeking out ways to serve others in my community, and that includes my community here. If you need help with your budget, want someone to walk you through developing a step-by-step spending plan, or just need someone to talk to you about money or life, just drop me a line. I’m happy to speak with any of my readers and to offer you support and guidance.
How about you? What can you do to help others this year?
Support Other Women
Many years ago I started a networking group called “Dare To Be Phenomenal.” It was started because there was a serious lack of support for women business owners in my community. I was looking for a way women could come together in community and help each other in business. We had regular monthly meetings, shared out expertise, supported one another as businesses took off, folded, or changed in some way.
It was a phenomenal group. Unfortunately, I had to put the group on the back burner due to my mother’s declining health.
Months before my mom got sick I had launched my coaching practice and was poised to break through the six-figure mark with that business. My mother’s illness derailed that plan, and I was left wondering what I would do. I finally listened to my friend and started this blog. I not only reached my first-year goals but surpassed them creating a steady full-time income.
This year I want to get back to actively supporting women in business. One of the ways will be through this blog. I’m committed to regularly writing about how coaches, consultants, and business moms can create revenue-generating blogs that can offset expenses or can even become a primary revenue stream. It worked for me and I know I can help others too.
You don’t have to be in business to support other women. Maybe you’re a mom and can find the time to support another mother who might be struggling with her new role. Maybe you can support a woman who’s fighting a medical issue by taking her to a doctor appointment. There are lots of ways we can support each other; the possibilities are endless.
How can you support other women? Is this something you can resolve to do this year?
This Is The Year, Will You Join Me?
This is my breakthrough year and I hope you’ll continue to join me as we recreate our lives and transform our communities.
We’ll start by being kinder to ourselves and work at supporting and encouraging others. If you want to be part of this community, please consider joining my new Facebook Group, Create Your Phenomenal Life.
We’ll share tips and strategies not only about getting out of debt and mastering our homes, but how we can create the lives we want while supporting one another along the way. I look forward to welcoming you to the group!